I know for myself; this was a confronting task. To write these about the person I was marrying and then to say them in front of everyone was a big deal, I mean really big. I knew I was likely to cry and that only increased my anxiety.

My experience became normal when I started working with couples. I could see in them, what I had felt. I have found that 90% of people need ideas on choices and support.

In my guide, I have many examples to use or to give you the inspiration to put down in writing your own words. Some choices on how you both choose your vows can be:

• Prepare your own personal and separate vows
• Use the same vows
• Outside of the legal vows which are required by law in Australia, you don’t need to use anything else

There are legal vows which you must say on your wedding day. If you wish to add your own personal words you can after this. This is where you may need some ideas on writing.

As a couple, it’s important to ensure you both are on the same page. A good celebrant will help you; a great celebrant will do this for you. For me, giving you a structure, choices and scenarios helps you as a couple talk through want you both want to achieve the outcome you want at your ceremony.

For me, this is why I marry couples. Doing everything I can to make your ceremony better than you anticipated!